You know those hilarious videos that go viral? The ones depicting mundane tasks that go bad and become the things of legend?
Yeah, me neither. Because I’m too busy trying to survive incidents like those to watch them on the computer.
There are times I am pretty sure I am married to Clark Griswold. Thankfully, my husband’s crazy schemes usually succeed in the end, but the span of time between the idea and the end?
It’s the stuff of gray hair and frown lines.
Take an innocent chore like hanging Christmas lights. In normal families- I assume cause I don’t have one- the Hubs climbs the ladder and the Mrs. hands up the lights. Bada bing, bada boom, an hour later the strings have been strung and Christmas can commence.
My house? Well it’s built on a hill. So we must engineer blocks of wood in various sizes and thicknesses to place under the ladder legs to attempt a level surface. My job of holding the ladder becomes much more precarious when the possibility exists that I alone will have to save the only income earner in the family if the wind blows too hard.
And what happens when the wood blocks cannot level the uneven surface below the ladder? Hubs gets that evil twinkle in his eye, disappears for several minutes, and returns with this:
After many promises from Hubs that this is a perfectly safe option, I give in and hold the ladder while trying not to imagine the possible newspaper articles that this effort, gone awry, could produce in the local paper.
Little do I know that this is the easy bit.
|Hubs: “Bob does this all the time.” Me: “Are you talking about the guy down the road that only has two fingers?”|
Well, once again my doubting nature is proved wrong. The ladder holds perfectly
and the lights look fabulous.
But these little victories usually serve to drive the Hubs toward more bizarre antics. Sure, today it’s the Christmas lights, but tomorrow?